Saturday, December 29, 2012

A Xmas love story

It all began accepting a simple invitation to spend December 25th with a couple of friends instead of spending Christmas at home alone.
Light, wine and crisps were rolling like joints from head to toe. Two young cats played the roll of tornados moving all the energy around. There was so much going on that the build up became a little too intense but we were still pretty much oblivious to anything extraordinary.

The wizard began creating magic in that room, light was poured over the foreheads of everyone around. Love was in the air, thou many still ignored what was going on, dismissed as a wishful thought in a day to remember the night but allowing the light to bee born once again.

Dreams began to emerge, tarot and adivination played a frantic game of invincibility towards the unknown, yet, it all began to make sense very quietly within our hearts. The three of us knew something was beginning to soar within our hearts. What was it? Probably another explosion of dreams and expectations as many many times before. However, this time was different, thou we still didn't know or at least we weren't sure of anything at all.

Light began to emerge as a young couple of gay men began to make love in the window in front of us. All our attention moved from us to them as they caressed each other cheeks, played with each others tongue and warmed each others soul. A movie being played in a truly reality tv within our heads and hearts.

Our intense sight didn't moved those boys waters. Our presence in their world was completely ignored as we watched them filling our hearts with hope and joy.
Thou we still only wished we were them or them us in a cyclonic turn of events. We realise all we want is to love and be loved in return. Although many still think love is all the same, a kiss, a look, a touch and it is all the same one and it's truly not, never the same. For we all long for love. Yes, that's true, but we all long for different kinds of love even though it looks and feels the same it's definitely not.

One, longed for passionate love, intense burning light like the fire that's created by the sun.
Two, longed for a steady warmth. A protective shield that surrounds a family in love.
Three, longed for powerful enlightenment within oneself. Self love that last for ever.

By the end of the upgrade process of deep transformation, on Xmas day we all received our presents. As we all now become our love.

Thank you Father Christmas for this wonderful time. From the moment of our creation, throughout the many lifetimes lived, to the moment of now IAM truly grateful for the love, care and light that IAM

We
Love
Always
Now
xXx





Wednesday, December 19, 2012

MASTER WATERS


MASTER WATERS
"Everything you need to know right now is capsuled in a sigle drop of water"

Beehold the power of nature as the humblest servant of life, wise teacher that awaits for the student to rise. 
Oh wonderful creator how deaf and blind I was, until a single drop of water entered my new life and your love entered my soul.
What is now will always grow and by my hand will produce glow of the sweet conciseness that awaits motionless for the untrained eye.

Where will you Master Waters takes us now,
oh teacher my teacher, how long have I waited in the darkness of my driest land. Is it now our time to rise or in or its is not the time to splash?

I am not longer myself and I cry to my mind to quiet itself to faithfully listen to your whisper, to faithfully listen to my heart xXx

Speak Poetry 1


XxX
LISTEN
There's a lover who calls your name, In winter, spring and bane.

This is today's Tora in pursue of love, guidance and peace. Listen, as a bigger shout comes within that brightens up as we begin the final countdown of life and death.

Let us join in holy matrimony 
and allow the christening of our faith in light, for all the moments of joy cannot compare to the blossomed tears of endless pain.

Begone to the highest mountain, this is a chosen destiny created by us.
In the middle of the tower your crown awaits, take your spade and walk away with the old dark of night, as Now becomes Light's bright new day.

So, in silence we become,
the wonders of them all
YES, You and I God
LISTEN TO THE VOICE
xXx

Saturday, December 1, 2012

TODAY iBEECOME ONE WITH ALL


I waited 42 years for this moment. 
My earliest memory is of this greatness reflected in the simplicity of WIND over my face. FIRE became my weakness and destroyer of everything around until it became the streng
th that transformed me from the inside out. WATER run free, YES free as the blood that nurtures my emotions and EARTH, my Earthly roots of this reality I call home. In ETHER I Thank You for showing patience and respect, love and understanding.
For years I waited for a miracle and only now I see IAM that miracle that waited to be discovered. For years I longed for love and today I long no more. For years I wanted all and NOW i need no more.

TODAY iBEECOME ONE WITH ALL
TODAY iBEECOME ONE WITH NONE 




01.12.12

XxXxXx



Tuesday, November 27, 2012

I AM READY

There has been such a movement in the last few days. I can still remember step by step from November 12th. Scorpio new moon, sex with the gods and falling deep into the abyss of self understanding and control.
We are no longer bound to events out of our control. We realise now fully the capacity of our mind to transform our reality and with this new awareness new challenges arise.

What would you do once you fully understand how your life works? Which decisions will you take? What changes will you make?

Something that happened to me was that at the moment I realise... More than realise, when I experienced the power of my being and mind suddenly everything changed.
I'm now in a process of wanting very little from the outside, but really getting kind of obsessed with how can I transform myself. Obviously this is not a one way road since I have to be aware of how can I benefit the world around me with my transformation.
I'm now learning to think multidimensional, in the way I am, in the way I know I could be and in the way that is still unknown from my awareness but can easily sense there's something there.

This has taken me to make different choices in my life. I'm testing my strength and convictions. As if consciously preparing myself for my inner transformation.

I feel needles in my arms and legs.
Im going to sleep now
xXx

Monday, November 19, 2012

New Entry, Old Shit

Here we are again, in this beautiful process of documenting everything. So far I'm getting better in documenting shit as when things go great I'm more interested in enjoying life than sitting in the dark with a candle on writing about how none-interesting things are at the moment.
In another perspective I also realise how when things get less entertaining I get more time to quiet my mind and enjoy the peace of the present moment. I'm sure this is exactly what I need at the moment thou sometimes I wonder if I could've taken different choices that would've take me to different realities.
However, the reality that feels so unreal at the moment is this longing for love. I know it has been growing for a while and in the last few weeks I got to meet few people and can feel my sex appeal getting stronger but still there's no definite relationship happening.

For a moment I thought it could be a woman but sexually are not very attractive to me, though I know it could be simply because I don't know them. However, the simple fact that I need to do a lot of explanation about my baggage makes puts me off the possibility. I'm still open for anything at the moment. I feel sometimes I could be attracted to anything but it just easier and in my comfort zone to meet with a man.

In my relation with life without romance I feel very in tune with my spirituality, nothing to do with any god or shit. It is more in tune with my soul and people's soul. I truly feel connected and I wish for more opportunities to connect even more but my ideas are too radical, so far I only get big eyes and silence in response to my thoughts. So, I keep them to myself thou that's difficult because in some way I'm only being myself and I find more difficult now not to be me.

In another news, I decided to stop taking the ARV or medication for the HIV shit. I was never truly convinced about them killing or helping deal with a virus. For me the only thing they were doing were healing my fears and killing my doubts. Amazingly so, today in my doctors appointment at the St Mary's Hospital, I was told the 'viral load' was undetectable. Something really amazing after only one month taking the meds. For me a perfect indication of how the body reacts to external and internal factors. I would be very curious to see how the tests come back in 3 months after me stoping the meds but having the safety and security of a home and income as I never had before. For me will be the real test.

In the meantime, I throw away the meds but kept the containers and filled them with Vitamin C, Mutivitamins and Coral Calcium taking them every night at the same time as the meds.
I also began what is known as the Greatest Kundalini Meditation which is called Sadarshan Chakra Kriya. 11-31 minutes meditation every morning with the objective to help me free myself from doubts and last fears. Mainly the fear or doubt of healing myself not only in the body but in the mind and soul.
I began with the meditation last November the 12th, so by my birthday on the 21st Dec, I will be completing my first 40 days ever of continuing meditation into the greatest alignment ever, cosmically and within my mind, body and soul.

Everything is alright. I could wish for more or better but I'm perfectly ok with what I have at the moment. Even the fucked up computer cable that keeps me from the Internet and allows me to write my memoirs, the absent love that gives me the opportunity to focus on myself and the tight finances that keep me grateful for the ability to always cover my needs and few pleasures.

I'm learning to be simple, I'm learning my lesson well and I'm very grateful for it.

I wish for more love, romantic and intellectual love, the possibility to be more beneficial to people and for peace of mind... Oh and I wish to remember better my dreams.
THANK YOU :)

LoveAlways
xXx

Saturday, November 10, 2012

YES 'Book of Revelations' 21.12 THE KICK



BEEWARE THIS MOVIE CHANGES EVERYTHING !!!
STAY AWAKE AND KEEP YOUR EYES OPEN... FOCUS
This is THE KICK that will send you flying into the future. Your Ego wont get it, Your Soul does. Focus on what you're feeling and allow yourself to be guided. You've earned the right of passage. The boat will sail with or without you, your call.
GOOD LUCK AND BON VOYAGE

NOTE: There's a special Present just for you after the minute 27 but you need to patience and watch the whole video to claim it.
ARE YOU READY?



Original Work Channeled
Music: Triple Mantra for Protection. By Gurunam Singh
BUY HERE PAPERBACK: http://www.lulu.com/shop/eduardo-blanco/yes-book-of-revelations-2112/paperback/product-20471362.html

YES 'Book of Revelations' 21.12
Simple guide into the 2012 change of consciousness and expansion of the Self concept. This book represents the first step of  transition into Oneness and a Higher idea of our Self as single entity.

How can we bring peace into our world? Until we bring peace into our hearts and mind first and this can only be achieved by realising there's Noting to fear. Already exists all we need to create abundance, prosperity, happiness and health for everyone in this world, we only need to work together as One.

This is part of the 'To Bee or not to Bee" concept, that will allow a crossing from the dual individual identity to the united collective consciousness. We are not out names, we are not the history and drama of this lifetime. We are the experience gathered and the impulse to Bee and to express our true essence, as we come to understand that we can only feel complete when we are together, working in unity with love for the benefit of All.


Spiritual-Life Coaching
http://www.eduardoblanco.com
https://www.facebook.com/SpiritualPersonalTrainer

https://www.facebook.com/LoveAlwaysx3

LoveAlways
xXx

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

A PROPHECY OF TIME



Reading between lines is a talent I do enjoy 
As much as praying to all the mighty Gods. 
In loving times of crying Knights
We came galloping into the Light.

Go in circle one more time,
Come and show me you can cry
This is not a rhyme nor a prose
Is just loving men in a song that's lost
The time you found is not time at all
It's our soul who asks for more.

Keep on crying to the night and
No more sorrow will be found.
The shining Sons are brightly crowned
A morning shadow is all you are.

Never mind your carcass vessel
Never mind your mindless eyes
This is the final warning of darken times
This is I of pure blood line.

A Rose will kill you with a thorn,
but we shall live beyond the fall,
Keep on coming through the right
Yearn for mourning y'all thy time.

THE TIME OF NIGHT SHALL DIE AND
WE SHALL LIVE FOR ALL THAT'S I.

11.11.11
KkK
xXx

I AM NOT THE ANTICHRIST


I AM THE ONE WHO OPPOSES CRIMES AGAINST NATURE.
THE ONE WHO DIES MANY TIMES,
THE ONE WHO ALWAYS COMES BACK

-IAM THAT WHICH IS PURE AND CLEAR.
-YES, THAT IS ALL I AM
-AS I AM THAT WHICH IS DARK AS WELL?
-IAM ALL THAT I AM AND NOT.
-IAM LIFE -I AM DEATH
-IAM LOVE -I AM FEAR
-IAM LIGHT -I AM DARKNESS

...AND SO ARE YOU...AND SO WE ARE

YES, THAT'S RIGHT... LIGHT IS BEAUTIFUL AND COMFORTING AND SO IT'S DARKNESS WHEN YOU ARE FREE AND FEARLESS, WHEN YOU BEECOME IT. NOT TO DWELL, ONLY TO EXPERIENCE... ONCE YOU FEEL AS DARK AS MUCH AS LIGHT, THEN AND ONLY THEN USE YOUR POWER AND CHOOSE WHICH SIDE TO SERVE. BEFORE THAT LET YOUR INTUITION GUIDE YOU INTO YOUR NEXT ADVENTURE. ENOJY... LIFE IS SIMPLE....RE-MEMBER NOW

-NO, DARKNESS IT'S NOT BAD. IT IS ONLY AN ASPECT OF LIGHT. IT IS AS PERECT AND BEAUTIFUL OF THAT WHICH IS NOT. WITHOUT DARK LIGHT WOULD SIMPLY NOT EXIST.
-CALM DOWN, ITS ONLY A CHOICE.
-YES, YOUR CHOICE.
-HOW?-CONFRONT YOUR FEARS.
-WHICH?-ALL OF THEM.
-WHY NOT?
-NOTHING, JUST TURN THE TV AND WATCH THE NEWS. YOU CAN SEE YOURSELF BECOMING ALL THAT WHICH YOU ARE RUNNING AWAY FROM, YOU ARE DARKER THAN THE DARKEST TIMES. WAKE UP FROM THE MADNESS AND INSANITY OF YOUR TAG-TIME, YOUR EGO IDENTITY DOES NOT SERVE YOU BUT YOUR EGO DOES.

-THIS IS NOT ABOUT SCARING PEOPLE, IT IS ABOUT CONFRONTING THEM WITH THEMSELVES. 
-WE ALL HAVE A DARK SIDE. BEECOME COMPLETE AND WELCOME YOUR DARKNESS AS I AM LIGHT

-WHY?-YOU ASKED FOR IT.
-WE ALL DID, EVEN BEFORE TIME-WHO AM I?
-I AM THE FIRST TO JUMP
-I AM THE FIRST TO CROSS
-I AM THE FIST TO CALL
-I AM THE FIRST TO START

-21.12.12 IS THE CROSSING SIGN-THE GATES ARE OPEN NOW
-AS THE WATER FLOWS, THE FIRE COMES.
-LET IT ALL BEE DONE NOW
-AS I TAKE YOU STEP BY STEP INTO THE OTHER SIDE
-ALL YOU NEED IS TRUST, 
-ALL YOU ARE IS LOVE.


YES 'Book of Revelations' 21.12IN 666 PAGES IT CHANGES EVERYTHING! AVAILABLE NOW

WITH MUCH LOVE&LIGHT ALWAYS
YOUR COACH & FRIEND

INLAKESH
XxX

Thursday, October 18, 2012

While I was in Coma


8th January, 2012
Couldn't breathe and I lost consciousness but I also gained access to another place...

FIRST STAGE:
Everything is red, red lights, red shadows, red energy. I'm scared. Nothing feels right. I'm alone but I can't move. My body doesn't respond, I don't know where I am. I hear noises, someone is outside, I think is my mother, I'm not sure. I'm terrified, please somebody help me. Nothing,- everything is fussy, I can't distinguish forms. I see shadows... I'm cold. SOMEBODY HELP ME! - No, I can't talk either. -Where am I? Why nobody listens? What's happening? Who's talking?

I can still hear my mother and she's with my aunt outside this room. -What room? Where are they? where am I? Why are not allowed to see me? Why cannot see them? What am I doing here?
- I know I'm in hospital, I can remember the ambulance and the two male nurses who brought me in. I remember not being able to breathe or talk, so why I'm not having problems breathing or talking now? I'm not in my body right now. I don't feel or see my body, so who am I? what am I seeing? Is this my mind? How am I seeing? I'm so scared, I don't want to be here. I feel cold. Arrrrrgggghh, Please God help me! Somebody help me!!!

- Who's there? There's someone here, - I can see you. Let me see your face!. Why I cannot see your face? What do you want? Who are you? Leave me alone! What's that...? Is that powder? Why are you blowing it all over me? Wait, wait. Where are you going? Please somebody talk to me! What's happening to me?...

-Ma' where are you? I can still hear you but can't see you.
-Yes, I can feel you. -Yes, yes, I can feel you!! I know you're close. Thank you mother, I'm sorry for all this pain I'm causing you. I'm so sorry, please forgive me. What...?
- Yes, ok... I'll calm down. I'm very scared, I don't know what's going on.
- Ok, yes, I'll relax. Stay with me, please don't leave me alone.
- Yes, I still feel you, as if you were inside my heart and speaking to me in whispers. I love you mom.


SECOND STAGE

-Where are they taking me? Where is my mother?
I feel more relaxed now, is like they were waiting for me to calm down. Now I can be taken into another room.
-Oh look! That's my family. I can hardly see them all from this far but I know they're there. This corridor is pretty large, where are we going? Probably I'm here to see my family and so they can see me too. I don't know why but I'm very grateful I can see them. My cousins, aunts and uncles and of course my mother. Thanks god for that.

-Hey, is that you love? What are you doing here? You're supposed to be in London. I can't see you, come closer.
-Yes, it's you my love! Why are you crying? where am I? This feels like a box, why am I in a box?. Oh don't cry, I'll be fine, you know me. I always get better. Oh my love, I love you, please don't cry....


THIRD STAGE

What's this now? Where are we? We, who's we? I'm going silent. I not talking, only knowing. This is not about me, this is something beyond mind. Am I dead? Everything is black, dark but I can sense great depth, why am I still thinking? am I thinking?. It's Nothing, no sounds, no light, no forms. Just very silent...



FORTH STAGE

LIGHT! Im not talking - only seeing and feeling, I'm aware. I can see a vast horizon opening in front of me. As vast as my perception can become aware of. I feels as if I were in front of a massive beach of pure light. I can see a line, like the ocean when it meets land. Everything is so bright, something inside call me to move forward. I begin to approach the dividing line. This place is huge, there's a sense of expansion beyond anything I know and somehow it also feels very familiar.
With every move forwards I feel as leaving behind my body. I feel lighter, I don't feel gravity. I'm expanding, oh this is beautiful. I'm now as large as the space I'm in. I feel at home, secure, protected, guided, loved. Loved, YES! I feel very loved and welcomed. This is where I belong. I'm getting closer to the crossing line. I'm flying, is this flying? As I move closer and closer I feel the expansion of my being covering all space, I have no weight. A very strange yet powerful sensation of freedom. I'm not longer my body. I am at peace. I feel peace. I feel great. I feel ready!

What's that? Who's that? I can see shapes standing on the water or whatever it is on the other side. Definitely they are people but can't see any heads or feet. They look like flames of light standing next to each other. They are here to welcome me back, yes, I can feel them, I feel their love. There's so much love. I feel that love is me too. I am love. I'm going home.

I'm about to cross now, two figures approach me, it feels as my ... Oh my god, granny, grandpa. You're here, Oh my Lord, I love you so much, thank you, thank you, thank you. I know, it's now. It's time to go. Lets...

- What's that? A ray of light coming from behind me over my right shoulder makes a turn and gets right into my heart. Like a fishing line made of light and connecting into my heart. Somebody is bulling me back. I can feel a tiny pull back but is not strong enough to stop me from crossing, but wait...
Now I can there are more lights coming from behind me, in every direction, so many, so quick, From every direction but all coming from behind. Right left from below and above all turning and getting into my heart and pulling me back. This time they are much stronger. I can see my granny and grandpa moving away. Nooooo, please, I don't want to go back. Please let me stay.
-No, I'm not going back. I don't want to go back, I don't want to go back. NOOOOOOO....!

---SON STOP RESISTING AND LET GO. YOUR NEXT 40 YEARS ARE NOT THE SAME AS YOUR PREVIOUS ONES. NOW IS TIME TO APPLY YOUR EXPERIENCE. THE TIME OF PAIN IS NOW OVER, GO ENJOY BEING AND SHARE. REMEMBER YOUR LIFE NOW THEIRS.---

FORTH STAGE
-Oh god, I'm back. Oh this feels so heavy, this world is so cold. What are they doing to me. What the... Is that water? Am I being clean. This body is in so much pain... I cant move, my throat hurts, everything hurts... but I'm alive.... again.
----------

As I woke up and gained consciousness, found my mother by my side. She then told me the miracle created on Facebook where she managed to blog every day her emotions and pain.
She also told me about the chains of payers and healing work done to me in so many parts of the world. Bali, India, Spain, London, Chile, Brazil, Mexico. Counting with Mayan Elders and Shamanic healers. Probably hundreds if not more united in pray, powered by my mothers love and compassion with one intention.... to bring me back.

I knew from that moment that the lights that pull me back were in fact all the prayers and healing work with my name. I also knew that my life is not longer mine as I was ready to give it away. Now my life belong to them, to all of them. And from that moment I can only Bee their servant. I am devoted to my master, the collective consciousness of this planet.

... So help me God

LoveAlways
xXx




Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Good Bye iSportYou.com




Due to the very recent discovery of the domain iSportYou.com being bought by someone else, I decided to relinquish all ownership of this brand to the Universe. So It now can give it to whomever fits better the Job.
It is a hartbreaking experience as this project came to me in a moment very difficult moment of my life when I thought there was no way out of the darkness I was experiencing. During that time, I was chanelling so many messages and information from who knows where. I still remeber how the whole idea, concept, structure was given to me like dictation. I woke up with the dream and needed to write it all down. In less than an hour had it all figured out
Over £22,000 after, countles men-hours of programing, projecting, business managing, promotion, design, etc since 2009. With offices in Mayfair and 4 people on board. This project was in its way to success.... but I ruined it all and I take all responsibility.

My fear stoped me from taking accion when things were about to take off. We had contractors, invertors and people from NYC and Germany interested in the project. But I just couldn't face the challenge, I as for help from the only person I thought could help me...my brother, but he couldn't commit and when I did not performed as I should've, colleagues wanted to take over and I jumped like lioness protecting her babies in reasurance that the project was MINE. Oh, how many times I have regreated that moment. I not only lost the business  but many firiends who put their energy, time, hopes in that dream... A dream that from the very begining wasn't mine. It came through me but It wasn't my creation, I only passed it on from somewhere above my consciousness.

And so, today in the effort to free Oneself, I choose to release all ownership of this concept, this idea, its contents, logo and website and everything relating to the iSportYou.com concept. If the person who bought the iSportyou.com domain feels like it,  can take over where we left or do of it whatever he/she wants to do. I will offer my unconditional assistance and support if needed and required. If not, I'll just move out sight.
Please contact me on facebook with anything relating to this matter. https://www.facebook.com/LoveAlwaysx3

Thank you iSportYou, for showing me things can happen out of nothing and out of nothing something beautiful was created.
Today WE RELEASE OWNERSHIP!

In humble gratitude,
Eduardo Blanco
xXx
16.10.12

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Chronicles of an Announced Death


Are you afraid of Death? I'm not.

Not because I never was but simply because I lived it 3 times during one single life time. But today I want to talk about the last time it came to me, announced and invited since 2007 when the previous encounter with Death happened as a result of a drug-overdose with crystal-meth, ketamine and marihuana. Then, the only thing in my mind was death. I had no dreams, no life-expectations, no hopes. I had just received a positive diagnosis of HIV a year earlier, the last Elder and moust loved memeber of my family died and I had nothing worth living for, at least it didn't seemed to me at that time.

However, my last death happened on January 2012, between the 8th and the 16th day while drifting away inside of a coma state, hospitalised with pneumonia and under my mother's care.
I was pretty confident I was going to die, but I was also pretty sure I was going to come back. Can't explain this, it was something like an instinct or faith guiding me through an event announced few years back.
Ok, to talk about how it was announced let me tell you what happened on 2007. After the over-dose and the recovery time needed to come back to the routine in my life, I was guided to create few documents, one of them was a video. This video was supposed to present my life in chronological order from birth to death... This video is posted in YouTube since the day it was created on the 21 April, 2008. (You can see the video at the end of this article). This video was created in less than 15 minutes, pictures scanned, video created and uploaded. I truly can't remember much of the process as I was under some kind of mental spell that kept me doing things without my mind registering or controlling the situation. I remember that the only guidelines to follow in the creation process was to include the logo for Mexico World Cup on the 70s and the then future London Olympics 2012.
Since I saw the video for the first time on Youtube I realised how much it felt like a story with a beginning and an end. The birth and death of some part of me but by then I was still not sure of anything. The video kept attracting my attention during the years. Many times I posted it on facebook and every time I watched it again, and again and every time it repeated the same message... an end is near, beware.

With my dark nature always very present, this idea of dying was pretty exciting. Thou I knew it was not really death as I had been prepared with so much information, wisdom and light that it would be such a waste to simply die and send all underground. Somehow, this idea gave me hope and also a very strong sense of immortality. I felt I could die as many times as I wanted and make an spectacular come back after only 3 days.

Anyway, to make the long story short. The winter of 2012 came with a present under the arm. By the first of january I knew for sure I was about to die again. I can't deny the certain fear inside my chest as there's no obvious guarantee that I will come back to life. But again, I was not going to miss the opportunity to meet face to face Death once again.
I knew, I couldn't keep living the way I was during my first 40 years of my life. I also knew a big transformation needed to happen within myself in order to fullfil my destiny, whatever this was.

So, when I began to experience the same symptoms I've had for the last 3 years of a closing of my lungs and loosing the capacity to breathe. I knew it was time to prepare for a metamorphosis. Months before, I had an amazing opportunity to create 3 workshops of 3 days each, in 3 weekends. The workshops were presented at "El Jardin de Shangrila" in Puerto de Carmen, Mexico; with the sponsorship of a now very close friend Heidi la Jurt. A beautiful soul that opened her house to me with the opportunity to create something beyond our understanding. 3 open workshops about my life: HEALTH, HAPPINESS AND PROSPERITY. This gave me the chance to review my life and realise that with in itself there was something of value to others. This was the very first time I did something like this. It was challenging and very stressful. I believe this was the last work of my mind as the captain of my life. Of course, financially the workshops were not a success but I didn't feel that was the true purpose of their existence. From the very beginning I felt my life slipping away but every morning I prayed for one more chance to finish what I had started for once in my life.

Christmas passed and the new born 2012 arrived while I was sleeping. That night went to bed early without waiting for the 00:00 hours. Mother and I couldn't care less about it. She knew already about my symptoms but as she started to feel ill as well we just joined up in a holistic outlook on how to heal ourselves. We decided to start a detox diet consisting of only fresh vegetables and fruit juices. She got better after a week with fevers and temperatures normalising. I, in the other hand got worse and worse.
I began to loose the flame within myself, breathing was simply another symptom of something so precious dripping away.
I was not afraid of dying... I was only afraid of being cremated right after my death. Of course I couldn't say this to mother. "By the way mom, when I die do you mind keeping my body intact for 3 days as I may be coming back?" NO WAY! She'd die in that moment. Her strength was weakening with every second and I thank her beyond words for respecting my wishes of not going into hospital or seeing a medicine doctor.
On the 16th of January I came back to life, my body completly useless like a new born baby.

(story of the time in coma coming CLICK HERE)
THE REST IS HISTORY...

I AM BACK AGAIN :)

XXX

Saturday, September 29, 2012

THIS IS HOW ITS DONE "Out of Body Experience"


Last night I left my body to travel in time and space to assist to a very special event that had my name on it in Mexico.
Between the work and dedication of three people, the participation of 13 people and thousands of Beings of many dimensions and plains we created a bridge of Love, Light & Peace across the whole world and beyond. However I know and feel the results now, I was not aware of the process been developed until it was fully completed... that happend last night and this morning as I woke up from a very real and powerful dream.

This is how it happend.
through the power of love and compassion, an event was created in Mexico that had my name on it and was intended to collect some funds to help me in the process I was submerge into. I became homeless on the 21 August and have been assisted by the government, living in temporary accommodation provided by the council. I lost all my clients due to very strange physical symptoms the doctors could not identify. My throat and rectum were completely blocked and even after few tests the doctors couldn't find anything wrong, so as they use to do, I was prescribed all the medication available for all kind of things. In the meantime, I was kept in a strange isolation of physical, mental and emotional weakness. At this point I still had no idea what was going on or if anything was interconnected or if it was part of the same process.

Spiritually, I was getting deeper and deeper into some sort of trance that lasted for many days, a numbness of the mind that allowed a connection with an emptiness never experienced before.
This situation continued for at least 3 weeks. For me it felt like some kind of identity death.
Suddenly by a change of attitude and perspective, I start to experience a very sharped awareness and ability to tap into some sort of wisdom or file cabinet that allowed me to understand what was going on and the reasons of all that was experiencing.
I began to meet with a Transcendental Psychologist and Reiki practitioner to exchange energy. I met this person first as through my Coaching services months ago. We had only one session but just after one single session she went into a journey of self discovery and told me that would probably take up to a month before we meet again. As she returned I felt an urge to contact her and offer to continue with the Coaching but she comment that money was now an issue and it would be very difficult for her to pay the £60 cost.

For me money has never been an issue and I offered to have an exchange of services. I did not offered it for free as just very recently I had learned about the flow and laws of Prosperity and Abundance, so I offered an exchange, my Coaching for her Reiki. And so we did.
Next week we agreed to meet with the intention to continue with her Coaching but from the moment we met our mind began behaving very powerfully and infused together in a dance of intellect, wisdom and philosophy. Our fist meeting we just couldn't stop talking about the Identity of the Mind and Ego and how to dissolve it to see the identity of the true-Self. Going deeper and deeper into consciousness as the minutes passed. Coaching and Reiki became very quickly 2nd in importance.
For Three weeks we met of Friday mornings and every time I was left with a massive lesson to be acknowledged and processed in order for the for it to be applied in real world ASAP.

Meanwhile, in Mexico there was a group of people so focused on the creation of an event that will help me continue or at least alleviate the difficult financial situation I was experiencing then.
During all this time also "Time" has been loosing its meaning as I began to experience synchronicity moments getting closer and closer and stating to live my life in some sort of wave that kept confirming I was at the right moment at the right place, doing and Being in alignment with the Universe.

As the day of the "Mexican Event" got closer, also the awareness and synchronistic began to close the gaps in between.
I kept posting all this emotions and thoughts on Facebook, some of them making sense, some of them not at all but to me it all made sense at some point even when I didn't know the greater purposes of those posts, intention or meaning. I kept faithful to my intuition and kept posting away :)

Yesterday 28.09.12 on the day of the Event, began as normal, but from very early hours things were just clicking in the right place. I began to get the final piece of many, many puzzles that had been commenced at different times but were going to culminate at the same time.
At this point, I was out of questions. I simply trusted that the Universe had much better idea of what was going on and I allowed my self to be guided purely by intuition.
Few steps were completed during the day, very powerful Ego confrontations, my Friday meeting to exchange energy, charging from friends love and warmth, solitude, meditation, a lot of breathing deep and slow techniques.

As the Sun began to dawn, my fears began to arrise. I felt the need of some sort of aid but remembered many of my posts on Facebook and specially one of them kept floating inside my mind "Today WE NEED NOTHING" So, diminish any need to drink, smoke or eat in excess. tried to keep my mind in silence as I have been practicing in the last few weeks like a silent mantra playing in awareness and consciousness or training a puppy or a child. Lots of patience, love and compassion. 
This time wasn't that difficult and decided to maintain as clear and in the moment as possible.

At this time also the main organiser of the Event in Mexico got online and we began to chat online. My connection was terribly slow. Many times I almost desist and forget about the conversation but something kept puling me to stay on and go with the flow of feelings and emotions created. At that point I knew the conversation was more that just a chat. We were actually building up in emotion for what was going to be the Main Event, beyond the Mexican One.

The conversation lasted for hours as I followed Diana through her journey few hours before the Event. Moments of joy, laughter, tears and a lot of connection beyond the internet but from soul.
At the end, we let each other go to start the performance of that night where something special had been prepared for both.

She went offline and I went to sleep. By that time my feet, my hands and whole body were in some sort of electric shock. I tried to relax and go into deep meditation while laying down.
I began to dream very vividly about being in my room and getting up from bed. At this point I thought it was me with my body until I get to the center of the room and shoot up like a spark of light into the darkness and vastness of the Universe.
First, there was nothing even thou I felt I was travelling great distances my eyes couldn't persive absolutely nothing. I began to feel comfortable with the travel and flying sensation as I approached sea of space debris so dense I needed to go avoiding getting hit as I travel trough it. At this point I realised I was not traveling alone. Some sort of guide kept me safe from heating. It felt as a travel guide who knew perfectly the area. Now I know He/She is ALEGRIA my travel companion, an angel or spirit that had been assigned to me in 2008 during an Angelic connection.
Anyway, I had no idea where we were going or what was going on but I was enjoying the very energetic and amazing trip.
We arrived at some kind of planet that looked very similar to Earth from outside but as soon as we crossed the atmosphere I found a planet completely covered by a decadent civilisation gone very wrong.
People had many mind abilities that I could recognise as I'm stating to have acces to them myself, but used in abuse or negligence for the benefit of few only. Machines, combustion everywhere, sunlight was very limited and clouds of smoke choked the throat. There were not many habitants at least I couldn't see anyone but felt the presence of some kind of humans living there. We reached land and we began to walk though the very dark city. Everyone was in hiding, but didn't undertand of what. As I felt someone running towards us in an intent to assault. That was what I felt. but the entity got closer at fantastic speeds, just crossed our bodies and went up flying angry for not been able to take over us. It was very strange but felt like as he could sense us but we didn't belong to the same diminution.

I was guided through the place moving at very fast speed to travel from place to place. We arrived at some sort of underground facility where human cloning happend un supervised and under low quality control.
Some how that civilisation had reached a very high level of technology and mind power without the wisdom or clarity of an awaken spiritual connection. Humanoids were being produced and not longer born. Funny enough many looked like me. I had the very strong sensation that they were my children.
As we walked through the laboratory of cloned humans, we found one that was walking freely. A young boy of 15-17 years of age. Very kind and sweet features but with an empty look in his eyes walk pass in front of us. I felt as he knew we were there and looked me directly in the eyes. I smiled and felt so much love for that boy, I knew he was connected to me in in some way. But he didn't pay to much attention to me and continue his zombie walk through the dark place.

Then I was taken outside again. This time in the middle of a riot or a street manifestation. Many loked the same as the boy, lost in an empty mind with only one desire to survive . This survival I felt depended  of energy, reason why they could sense our presence but could not harm us in any way. People were crazy, like a very hungry pack of wolfs. I felt very sad for those people who in reality had no reason to exist, at least not in that way as they were only result of ambition, greed and fear of very few ones who still had the ability to think and feel.
I was starting to get a grip of that world. Their lack of emotions and depth and the very decadent world they lived in, deprived of natural resources or at least clean air and water.

It was time to go back and my travel guide took my hand or or shoulder, can't remember well and we took back to the air. Crossing the vey thick and dense cloud of smoke that covered that planet. Then, into the sea of debris which I understood then was all the space trash from that planet.
We speeded up so quick that the debris disappeared turning into flashes of light giving the impression of comets traveling in the sky.
I was back in my room, I had no idea why I was shown all that. Why me? Immediately knew why. I have always Believed. I took responsibility over my acts and thought and realised that was only the product of my desires and dreams. I simply had reached a point of manifestation that made everything possible.

I entered and became aware of my body. I opened my eyes and felt gravity. I knew I was back in my body as in consciousness everything felt the same but in into the physical world.
I was very impressed and amazed with that journey. I still didn't connect the dots with the Event in Mexico. Got up, went to the toilet and came back to bed. I had another mini-dream.(Next post) as vivid as the first one but with different feeling.

When until I read Diana's chronicle of her Event in Mexico that everything clicked. I have traveled in space and time powered by the energy created in Mexico. Something only possible by the generosity and love of others. I feel I was shown the future of this planet or at least a possible outcome if we continue as we are, in zombie land.

Today has been wrapped in a vail of peace and serenity. Music played, incense burnt, meditation and cleaning. Silent and relaxed.
I know, I just wanted to document this to share with my loved ones and with those who are attracted to this post.

I send my loveAlways across time and space to all beings of planet Earth in shield of protection and love. To Mexico my kisses are in every grain of soil of that beautiful land. To my people: Diana, Akasha, Nancy and All who participated in this event. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU.

LoveAlways
xXx





















A Dream within a Dream


As I woke up, I was still submerge in a dance with tears and laughs.
All began waking up from a deep sleep and realising I was teaching my Awareness Class for this Sunday. I knew I was expecting some special people who I met during my times going around places but I never knew for certain who was going to come.

However, I woke up right at the end of the class and I saw a beautiful group of people in complete peace and communion with each other. I saw a Kundalini Yogui with long beard and a turban playing a little guitar to a young tall and brown teenager. The boy felt as if he was in loved with the Yogui as they sang and played music together.

I keep trying to remember what had happened, I didn't remember teaching the class and felt as if I had just black outed during its all duration.
I started asking around what had happened and everyone told me that everything was ok, that the class was beautiful. Everyone still absorbed by the peace with in.
So, I decided to calm my nerves and thoughts that at least the class had been given and everyone was happy. However, still I couldn't remember anything about it.

As people began to leave the room, I caught a young man in his 30s going to his car and asked him if the Yogui had taught the class and he said, No, that I did. I was very surprised and that helped to calmed my stress. But then, why I couldn't remember anything about it. The young man was packing his things in his car as I kept inquiring about the class. How was it? I asked. -Beautiful! He said as he closed his car and walked me back to the studio or salon to join the rest.

As we entered the classroom, I decided to talked to the Yogui and just thanked him for his presence and used the opportunity to ask for his opinion or feedback from my class. I knew I had not longer followed Yogi Bahjan's teachings to the line and had transformed the class into a completely different thing, guided only by my intuition and inner wisdom.
As I offered my gratitude I also asked why he was here for. He tells me that him and his young companion had come to see me, they knew I was about to start a new journey and they wanted to record some music with me to include it in an album that they were close to release to the public.

I was amazed with his words. I was feeling so honoured and thankful for even thinking about me. Then, by grabbing him from the shoulders we stood up as I wanted to hug him tight and lovely to welcome him and his guest.
We hugs for a timeless moment, then I welcomed the young boy who got so close to me that I felt his excited genitals pushing against mine. This excites my briefly but I make nothing more out of it.
As I turned to the Yogui again and taking a closer look, I began to recognise his face. In surprise I said loudly, -I KNOW YOU! And he said I know, -I know you too and I missed you for so long. His face stated to look cleaner as his beard began to disappear and a very youngish look began to emerge. In my mind he looked like a young Jonny Deep and we hug again as he began to cry inconsolably wetting my shirt.
He wasn't very tall. His head reached only to my chest but at that time it felt as if it was meant for that moment as he cried over my heart filling it with emotions of compassion, friendship and love.
I couldn't and was not even going to try to stop him. I just let him release his emotions in a warm flow of tears of joy.
We started to wobble our bodies and I placed my right hand over his head to offer Reiki and soothe his mind and emotions.
People around the classroom were preparing the room for some sort of celebration, a banquet was brought and displayed on a table someone else had brought. As they continue with the preparations, they looked at us with sweet eyes and smiles. As if they knew exactly what was going on.

My wobbling with the young Yogui soon turned into a soft and romantic dance as soft music or mantras had been playing all this time on the background.

I said to him, -you see? We're dancing together and We Always Will. Come, dry your tears. Now is time to eat and join the celebration.

As we approached everyone else, I began to wake up and the dream began to fog and get lost in a mist. As if a camera pulled back leaving the scene to continue as we return to the world where dreams truly come true.

My LoveAlways
xXx

Monday, September 24, 2012

Understanding Failure


Failure has been one of the topics going around my mind for a while now. Specially since I became homeless with no ability to care for myself... or so I thought :)
Paradoxically, it has also been the time of my life where I feel moust complete, relaxed and happy with my life and who I am.
How did I get into this strange combination? I feel that the answer can only be found in spirituality. If I measure my level of success by material gains, I can definitely consider myself a failure. I managed to loose or give up everything I came to own that in some sort of market has value. Not only economic but also emotional value.
A year ago I set myself into a journey that had no pre-determined conclusion only the search for the unknown, with the hope to understand a little bit better who I am and why did I choose to come to this world at this time in the history of humanity. I mean, I truly believe these are the best times to be alive as we experience a collective shift in consciousness in the human psique and as we are here to experience it, I feel people will talk about this times as one of the great moments in history.

Everything I believed to be of weight and importance before is now completely irrelevant in my life. All the things I always wanted are now undesirable or simply not needed. Which in the reality sets us in a very powerful platform of freedom and balance. However, I'm still only human, living within a society and moust importantly with a mission. One to be completed not by the romantic idea of a predisposed destiny but by feeling of totality and readiness, with the necessary tools and experience to face the challenge that makes my life worth living.
For me this means a complete alignment between the physical and etherial worlds, with a sense of service to the collective evolution that is as strong as my very own sense of survival.
This is by far something I can't explain with words. How did I get to this conclusion, why do I feel the need to create something of great importance for me and for all? I have many theories and much more ideas but whatever the Origen of this idea comes from, It becomes evident that cannot be from this one lifetime only, surely it is something beyond life and death. Obviously, this re-enforces my believes in re-incarnation and past lives but regardless of what was, now I feel a bit more clear about what 'is' and this gives me a better idea of what could be.
Still, in a sense of belonging to this society with all it cultural developments I can't see how having nothing is now more valuable than having it all.
Thankfully I had the opportunity to enjoy everything I once dreamt. Security, love from others, sexual attraction, economic power, etc. and would advice anyone seeking the spiritual path to first enjoy the glamour of materialism. Not because I believe having things is important now but because having it makes you realise they are not important. Otherwise the unfulfilled dreams and expectations will always hunt a weak heart and mind.

This takes us to another focus of this article; Why do we need to produce or create from cero everything we want for ourselves. What I mean by that is that life is full of gifts ready available to all but I find moust people are worried about working hard to make it all by themselves instead of allowing life to give you your desires. Explaining this: moust people, again, dream about winning the lottery but have very little idea what they will do with it. Typically is a big house, a nice car, travels and lifestyle and since they have played for years without winning much the other obvious solution is to work, work work. But I ask myself, is that all? Is that what we really want? Work work work for things we want but will leave behind at the end?

Of course, you can say: Is not about taking them but about enjoying them.
What I find very interesting is that I obtained and enjoyed all the things I wanted and a lot more by not doing much or studying decades or years of hard working labor. It's like some part of me always knew that even thou I wanted to experience all those things in life, it would not make me happy or give me peace of mind and heart at the end and therefore was not worth the investment of a lifetime to obtain them.
This may sound very cynical and absurd to specially people who have been raised in particular by the working class of society. As we are taught that the only way to obtain things of value is by hard work and by fighting for our rights. Nothing 'out there' can be obtained without sweat and tears.... or very good luck and a lottery ticket ;)

Well, actually there is, and a lot of it. One only needs to know where to look, understand that as we receive we have to give energetically, physically or emotionally (This is not my theory but the universal law of abundance and prosperity) and have a little humility to accept what's been given instead of rejecting for fear of "what do I need to give in order to have this" We all do what we need to do to have what we need, want and desire. What I ask here... is a lifetime obtaining outer security (like a house) really worth it? What about if we aim for inner security and we trust that we will always be provided of that that we need? I have many times confirmed this theory. Life gives you what you want, even if that means problems and a very slow and painful process of success and satisfaction because that's what you believe life is, a gradual process of achievements and goals. The problem I see here is that, by the time you obtain everything you worked for so long, at the end you may realise it is not what you really wanted in the first place... by that time you are, if lucky, as young as 40 and can start all over again or over 70 and the best you can expect is to loose your memory and not remember much of anything.

I'm only saying, in context, what does failure and success really mean? I know life has been about survival of the fittest, struggle and pain in in order to obtain pleasure and security. But that was before we were conscious about our own mind power, spiritual wisdom, clarity, conectivness, collective awareness, etc.


Visit The Venus Project

Yes, I'm homeless but with a home, I'm not employed but I produce and create day and night, don't have a salary but do have unlimited resources to provide me with everything I need and want. I don't have much material possessions but I need very little and my desires are attached to my dreams which are becoming reality as we speak. having lost most of things I fear very very little and after tried and taste moust of things in life, finally can take better decisions with a wiser and experienced mind.


So the real question is:

What is success?

xXx

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Understanding Oneness

In the run for a deeper transition into Oneness and putting together all the knowledge and the wisdom gathered, came to realise that this concept is so much more than a romantic idea of belonging to all or loving all. Oneness is truly our survival and support mechanism.
After coming in touch with my new One identity feeling its power and magnificence, I came to understand that however powerful, however wonderful it's not absolute. It becomes relative in relation to its own and to others.

Let me explain this. We know the term "as above so below" which indicates that whatever happens in one dimension happens equally in the lower dimensions" so the outer Universe has the same structure to our inner Universe of the body at atom and molecular level. Having the opportunity to wonder ourselves with similarity but more importantly, to give us an opportunity to learn from what is out there and apply it to what is in here, which in reality is the same or at least very similar.

The same happens in counciousness and awareness. As I AM THE ONE WHO MAKES IT HAPPEN, I have a very particular set of abilities and skills that make me exceptionally useful to my inner circles like family and friends as well as my outer circles as are my communities, society and the whole world itself. 'As above so below'.
As I get to know who I truly am and what I can do, I also realise what I AM NOT and cannot do. For example I'm very good in making business projects happen, starting from 0% to 10% is my realm. It has always been very easy for me to start a business, I find it simple and have no problem starting up the machine, having all the circumstances needed coming to me and alining with my desires. However, it's very challenging for me to keep the car going or do something useful with it. I normally end up bored and switching my attention somewhere else like a new project to start and leave behind.
At the beginning of my life thought this way of my personality to be a problem. If people are capable of having a project and see it until the end I should be able to do it as well, right?. Well, in theory yes, with a tiny winny difference, it is very difficult for me to do something I don't feel like doing. And again, I always thought of it as my lack of concentration or probably wrong Psicology like ADD (attention deficit desorder) instead of seeing it as part of my natural way and in perfect harmony with my Being and Universe.

Now after years and years of questioning myself, trying to find a light that can point me into the right direction suddenly some thing did. We all have our own abilities and disabilities which can be reversed at anytime just by the power of intention and with mind discipline. That is, someone like me can make of himself something different and learn more skills to help me Bee self-sufficient. At least that's what everybody does. Go to schools, universities and become professionals, they can proudly stand alone and create wealth and success... However, many still go back to the drawing board asking themselves 'is this all there is? Is this who I am? Is this my full potential?' And finally the big question 'Am I happy?' suddenly a hole inside the heart and a deep desire to cry appears showing us our true reality of unhappiness, deception and loss.
How come did we arrived to that point if we did everything we could to be happy at least everything we were told to do. As we keep asking these questions to ourselves we start opening the flow of new ideas and possibilities. We ought to go back to the beguining and start all over again. Something that only the brave and powerful can do. I mean we all are brave and powerful, the question here who Chooses to Bee?

When One finally sees a light pointing the right direction also sees others moving along getting closer and closer.
We are not longer lonely professionals but part of one big family who help, support and love eachother in the service to all. A big family that can only function successfully and efficiently with all the members onboard. If we can make our own family work together for a single project, we'll make our greater family (community, world) work together as ONE as well. Challenging, very challenging as moust of our families step on our toes and push our buttons to the extreme of explosion. But that is the way it is. 'As above so below' if we can make it work in small we will make it work in big.

In the big realisation, the small Big-Bang of creation, we come to understand that we are who we are and the way we are is perfection if you see it that way and are humble enough to look around for help offered and needed.

"Now, I as the Starter call upon my other parts to Awaken fully and Understand their roll in the greater sense of things"

I'm only the switch engine of this car, where are the wheels and the engine itself, the sits and the shields, every single part IT IS TIME TO RE-MEMBER... NOW.

We can make it work together or we can choose to struggle working alone, learning alone, being alone. The orchestra-man is not longer part of this symphony, now we ought to give others the opportunity to participate as we humbly reciprocate.

Only in this way we'll manage to evolve without outer chaos. Evolution and expansion are pushing forward, not only consciously but cosmically 'As above so below' and either we choose to go with the flow or we wait for the river bank to overflow and take you with it anyway. That is a Choice we can take Now.

We all are simply waiting for you to become part of Us. Let us Bee :)

LoveAlways
xXx

Thursday, September 20, 2012

DEATH of an IDENTITY

Today was my first day trying to understand the basics of my identity. By experience I know that before seeing/understanding anything One has to step out of it. So, in my very personal way to see life I began by posting on Facebook declaring death to my name. Obviously many thought I was in some kind of danger. I AM NOT. But was very interesting to see how linked to our own identity we all are. What would someone like me do and what people expect from me? And knowing that and more importantly, what I'm not doing in order to fit into my own boundaries and those who know me?
Furtunately, I have reached a point in my life where I can consider to be VERY if not absolute honest with myself and others and have found not much I'm hiding from public view.
However, I clashed with many people that don't dare to be this open and find it confusing and aggressive even for anyone to step out of their own per-established identity.
- What are you doing? Are you ok? why are you doing it?
This were the main questions I discover people ask when for a strange reason One decides to do something different. Assuming there moust be something wrong or abnormal. In my case, people very easily assume I'm drunk or smoking weed, many times I've been drunk and high but that doesn't mean that what I'm expressing is not myself. But what about when One counciously decides to speak up One's mind. Exactly what One's thinking? I found the first blockage comes from our own mind. Almost immediately stoping something I want to express and become the thing that others will judge. The moust powerful of them our own judgements.

So, I began to question myself. If I don't allow myself to be this silly in public networks like Facebook. How many things I'm stoping myself from doing in life?

We become people's pleaser, not because we are afraid of their judgement (too) but because we have become addicted to their acceptance and agreement for our acts. As this syndrome begins to become stronger, our own sense of honesty becomes weaker.
We are not longer bound for what we are call to do, we do what's safer and that is what I found to be a barrier within my own identity. I live a public life in the open to everyone, professional, personal and social because I aim to become ONE with myself and with the rest.
This goes beyond the romantic ideas of the New Age where everybody takes about oneness and unity but the more I see this movement getting stronger the more I see people building structures and boundaries between themselves and everybody else.

There's a lot of romantic thinking out there and I find it to be as illusionary as Ego itself. Not real, for it can crumble in a second after a drink or two or if someone steps on their toes or worse when One's inspired to do something and doesn't dare to move a finger.

IAM THE ONE WHO MAKE IT HAPPEN, I know that the more I practice the smallest the gaps get between declaring and manifestation. I'm getting very good in creating change but how good I am in maintaining it? That is the question am getting very close to answer

In the meantime, I love creating confusion and chaos around me. Nobody knowing what to expect, I wish one day they expect only the unexpected, filling up their eyes with surprise and wonder with what One's capable of doing while awakening their curiosity to prove if they can do it as well.

LoveAlways
xXx

Monday, September 3, 2012

3.9.12 A New Era Begins

I started taking retrovirals for one single reason My Life. Its not really in search for truth and revelling against the world anymore. This time is for me. Because I deserve a better life than the one I'm currently on.
After so many years understanding my fears and limitations came to see clearly what's my truth about HIV. For me I can say that I still don't believe in the virus but for other side I see I have put a lot of pressure in my immune system. Maintaining strong even in the worst of situations. I went through so many doors and the opportunities for growth were amazing but all has its price. Mine was the level of stress, confusion, doubt I dealt with. However very satisfied with the results obtained as now I can enter this new situation by choice and not motivated by fear.

I'm very tired and I need extra help to get me back on my feet

xXx

Saturday, September 1, 2012

1.9.12 Finally I can take a brake

I can't remember how it feels not to be in the struggle. Reaching higher to discover my own truth. Since I can remember I've been questioning myself and everything that affects me, maintaining my strength, endurance and capacity to fight back. I can say that I'm very proud of my achievements, I won't deny also that I'm now feeling very tired. Tired of the constant battle, gaining terrain over my own conditionings and fears. Understanding pain and suffering and truly feeling right inside.

Talking to a nurse last week she said "it seems to me you have reached the top of your mountain and now you can see clearly the land below. You have now the ability to take better choices that feel right for you. I think you've done it" I cannot measure the level of happiness and satisfaction that those words made me feel, right at the moment when I thought I had nothing left, no home, no money, no work, everything opens infront of me to show me that it's ok, now I can relax and be cared for. Now I know my truth and with that everything is right and perfect.
It's a very paradoxical situation feeling so good and at the same time so tired and weak but what makes it very interesting is a feeling deep with in that tells me that the good feeling will stay for ever and grow while the bad feelings of weakness and tiredness will disappear and transcend.

A big holiday of being me. I'll be back but right now it feels good to stop for a while and enjoy the moment of wisdom and inner peace I have achieved.

LoveAlways
xXx

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

29.8.12 Save Yourself or Nobody Will

Palestina, Siria, Libia, Haití, South Africa, Colombia, Mexico... The world is in turmoil and there's nowhere to run. Everywhere suffers the same injustice and terror. Fighting for a democracy that forces you to believe in their ideals making it only a different way of idealism. Capitalism, brain washed slavery for the masses. "We won't make you do things, you'll do them because you want to but we just make it so that if you don't life won't be as glamorous or attractive as you want it to be and worse, it will be unsafe for you and your loved ones". What a way to go.

Terribly sadden for an unaccounted death of a true hero Rachel Corrie who put herself in the line of a bulldozer and Palestinian homes in 2003 and just recently the Israeli gov denied any responsibility. Where are the pictures of a single man stoping a whole army which inspired a generation? Now, we have pictures of a single woman being run over by a heartless, mindless driver following orders and inspired by a national identity build around guilt and death.
Police in South Africa shooting miners at close range in the name of self defence when the miners were only making their voices heard of, women being stone to death for speaking openly, gay people hanged for loving openly, Muslims killing each other in order to prove they're right, Christians killing to prove everyone else is wrong.

Life is not longer a choice, its a burden. Where its even against the law to choose not to live it. You've got to choose to live you given life or else you better brace from hell. Where ever you are born doesn't matter, if you have enough numbers around to speak against the controlling body then you become a possible liberator or a rebel in the meantime a terrorist tag hangs over your neck as people around fears you from afar like a terrible disease who dared to speak up against the hand that feeds you. A life programmed, a mind trained for system of greed and service to few is not a life worth living 'free'.

How could all change? Little by little? One single grain of sand at at time? It will take many lifetimes! Condemned to experience a reality of suffering and hard work, illness and misinformation, manipulation and extortion, hunger and helplessness, control and lies, fear and separation.

Let's continue living in pride of the given heroes; gun-patrols walking the streets of the world holding flags of war and shouting words like democracy and freedom. Uniformed kids taught to obey superior orders. Completely vaccinated from self thinking or self awareness, robots in a mission to turn everyone else into them. Heroes who kill thousands and leave them to rotten in the streets, heal and care for themselves. But when one of this "heroes" die, is returned in glorious parades for the whole world to pay their respects. But who'll pay the respect to the kid who lost his mom or dad or both his legs and sisters in a bomb attack to his city?

And all these to support a system of corruption and mind control. Fearful of their own shadow and insecurities. Building walls to keep the enemy out only to realise the biggest enemy lives inside its own mind and then begin to fear it's own nature, self hatred arise and everyone else's too.

But there's hope in the dream as we always wake up from them. Nightmares only last for as long as they stay not to frightening or they'll wake you up, becoming its own enemy or the collective solution as it only needs to continue until it cannot continue anymore. Let us hope we reach this point very soon and hell brakes loose and the heavens brake open for the sake of all. God, let it all be done with no delay or we'll be damned by the blessings of our own suffering. In the meantime we do the best we can to stay sane, strong while finding reasons to smile, love and pray.

LoveAlways
xXx