This week had the opportunity to experience one of the basic feelings of my life. I had the ability to confront my greatest fears once again. This time with the intensity of my work.
I've been working and sharing my abilities with the help of the tarot readings. I cannot express enough the satisfaction I get to see my connection with my clients and their needs.
I realised the enormous help I can be to assist in their advance as souls.
On Monday I had the chance to sell my coaching program for the first time in Metepec. I could see the importance and need of my services and the openness of my student to receive them.
It is a great opportunity to make a difference and I took it, not knowing at the time how important was going to be for me too.
This Universe had lied down the perfect setting for a great move, presenting to me the opportunity to help myself helping others. This is not new in my spiritual training, actually is the norm and modous operandi since I'm conscious of my own personal training.
When I realised the very big responsibility of my new job, immediately kicked my insecurities... Am I ready for this? Am I good enough? 3 days after my new contract and one day after my first coaching session came a physical response, getting a terrible diarrea and abdominal pain that kept me up most of the night. It felt like my stomach just went knots ;) I needed to cancel my appointments for Thursday (today) and stay home. I slept most of the day.
During my time in bed today I also processed a lot of information. Why is this happening to me? Why am I sabotaging my own success? Why do I feel so vulnerable? And finally, what am I so afraid of?
I realised that the terrible stomach flu was caused by my enormous fear and insecurities. I could almost pictured a strength line from my mouth to my rectum where whatever I took ran off instantly out of me. I realised a very intense feeling of unworthiness and guilt. I was so afraid of such great responsibility, not because I haven't done it before but because this time everything was different. I was totally aware and awake of the greater picture. I saw myself as this important piece in the structure of the Universe.
Was right in this moment when I realised the love and support from God. I had been offered the chance to help someone who could help me. This happened in very simple ways, as always. The day before, during the coaching session, I had put a homework to my student, to repeat and believe the phrase: I deserve it and it is for me. I said it with her so many times during the session, not realising at the moment I was saying it for me too.
Im very grateful for the great ability to understand the process of life and I'm sure of great success in all future situations. Now I'm working on my own new affirmation: I deserve it and it is for me, picturing all the good things I'm ready for. It feels so right, like I'm loving myself. Like I'm learning to grow, growing helping others. Learning teaching others, loving me loving others.
Thank you
xXx
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