UPDATE SUMMER 2016

WOW & WaDaFu! Shit, Mothafucka.
What can I say from all that has happened since my last post. Oh my Holly-fucking-caw. This shit is real. Not only real... This shit is powerful. Way beyond anything I ever wanted or thought I desired. In short, I'm just going to begin telling in big chunks what's been going on for the last 6 months.

MARCH 2016: That was the month that I broke up with my family. We travelled to Madrid [My mom and I] on the 3 of March [3/3] with the intention to be together. In fact my mother got her ticket paid by some people in Spain who thought she hadn't seen my brother for years; and that was true. What she didn't mention was that they hadn't seen each other because they didn't care to meet and not because they couldn't do it. So, from the very beginning the trip was kind of doomed. Somehow I knew something 'not-good' was going to come out of it. Anyway, we went and met in person. I'm going to omit telling what happened because in all honesty I'm not that much bothered right now. What is important is that because of that trip I lost close contact with my mother, be her on request, arguing that we had become co-dependant and that we needed to be less in touch (great mistake she will regret one day, since we hated each other since the moment of my birth and we only began to build a good relationship since I was diagnosed with cancer in 2000 and became very rich, then later when I became very sick with AIDS, but lets keep it that way.) So, one big breakthrough was that of my mother's desire to break-free, the other was from my brother. One night, the last night we were going to be all together in Madrid, my brother and I went for a walk. In that walk, once again he assumed my life was a mess and that I needed to change my point of view some how. Regardless of what he thought, the fact was that he was not considering one bit of how his words were really affecting me, although I kept repeating "this is not what I need to hear right now." And probably it wasn't since it destroyed my desire to build something together with them and my ability to see them as my role-models [he and my mom]. However, now in the other side of 'Aspen' I realise that those words were precisely what I needed to hear. His words sounded to me very disempowering and defeated. But anyhow, because of those words, I gave up my idea to become greater together and somehow [conquer the world] become one power that could unite all skatered parts of itself.
After that trip, I came back to London and began taking HIV meds as a way to send all my efforts to find natural health to go-and-fcuk-themselves! And since the best way to hurt them has been by hurting myself, well that was what I thought was needed at that time.

APRIL: Tony dies. My upstairs neighbor dies holding my hand after 3 weeks in hospital and one in coma. He is alone here in London and by some kind of destiny I'm left with his home keys, the telephone number of his sister Vittoria in Livorno Italy, who I called in the moment of Tony's death and the possibility to take care of him, his things and his ashes. I took under my resposability to deal with paperwork, funeral stuff, clearing of his flat, giving stuff away, throwing most stuff away. From the moment of his death he became uncle Tony to me, and my life began to change in every possible way. Having had the opportunity to assist on his passing with a very relaxing mantra, and talking to him as if I was guiding him on a hypnosis to let go and access the other world, everything became sort of magical. I begin to feel very strong in body, mind and spirit.

MAY: I began having a sort of breakdown. I smoke too much weed, but I don't care because in a way I was having an amazing spiritual awakening, having been freed from my family and the connection I felt with uncle Tony, those circumstances played in paradox with the sadness I felt for loosing my family and the amazing power I was beginning to build within myself. A sort of revelation became the fact that I was not longer tied to a certain outcome and was feeling as free as never before. That's when I began smoking weed on live-camera on facebook. In that moment, I felt I lost all credibility from the few people that followed me, and my family simply realised I was simply as sad-crazy-fuck.... True! LOL
However, that sad-crazy-fuck was feeling as happy, sane and godlike like never before, my mind began to put the final pieces of the puzzle on the right place and a new image was beginig to form in from of me. Still I didn't have much of an idea but the idea of not-knowing was not longer real. I just began to feel very strong.

JUN: I get become so rich that I begin sharing the abundance. However, small circumstances become big turn of events. I hire a PT to work harder on strengthening  my lower back and shoulders, few weeks into training, training with Virgis I hurt my back. I decided to take the responsibility, but he doesn't seem to worry about it. Seeing his very little care, I decided to sue him but we managed to talk [Virgis and I] on my way to the lawyer and I changed my mind when he agreed to meet me in my home for a 2 hour face to face meeting where I was just going to tell him exactly what I thought of him. After the meeting we agreed to meet every Monday for 2 hours at my place for a session in consciousness and mind-expansion. That was the first time I began to talk about Quantum Consciousness. Then, the magic really began to happen. Then, Reinaldo's mom die, and he leaves to Brazil finally leaving me alone and smoke free. My life rocketed in that moment. paradoxically, as a part of me was feeling stronger another felt challenged. I paid for some courses to update my PT qualifications and I was terrified because I didn't feel I could do it. Information was diificult to absorb.

JULY: I begin to teach and talk about Quantum Consciousness. Open a group in Meetup and begin to meet with people every wednesday and thursday to talk about my experience and the experience of life Im living in this moment. Life becomes such a game, I begin to feel stronger and stronger. As I begin to work with Virgis and he offers me free PT sesions in exchange for the sessions I'm working with him, my back experiences a remarkable recovery, and not only that, it feels a lot stronger that even before the injury. Somehow I feel that the way the incident was managed allowed stronger bonds to form not only in my body [bones] but in out collective and individual minds. I began to study and to create structure within my mind and life. Yoga and meditation become pillars, stronger pillars than before. Yusral Hakim tells me how bad he feels about his life and I invite him to come to london and stay with me. He books his flight for the 20th August, 2016.

AUGUST: I continue with Quantum Consciousness. I'm definitely more balanced that ever before. Feel very strong and clear without smoking. I begin to find easy my studies and get on track with them. Also the meetings become a success and talk with people 1-1. Something begins to feel weird. I feel like my work will transmute somehow. I buy my ticket to Italy for september, when I'll be taking Uncle Tony"s ashes back to Italy after 22 years of not going back, to be reunited with his family on his birthday the 20th Sept, when he was going to turn 64. Hakim arrives from Malaysia, and I realise he has no money with him but £260 BP. That reminds me so much of my time when I came to London from MeXico with only £250 pounds in my pocket. But it's ok, the abundance felt since April was still flowing in great currents so, I decided to take on all his expenses. The first two weeks are fine and he begins to see a lot of recovery. His body is still 90% covered in psoriasis. The challenge is big but I feel bigger. The QC meetup stops feeling attractive to me. I feel like I did what I needed to do and that was share my experience.

SEPTEMBER: It's only the 5th and its already having massive changes. Today is monday and this past weekend we smoked weed with Reinaldo. Today I didn't go to the gym but we did the Nabhi Kriya and did a meditation. I my relationship with Yeshsua [Hakim journey's name] has become a little special. We are learning from one another and I'm trying my absolute best to be real and show all sides of me, not only the ones I know are going to be liked and accepted but the ones that present a challenge too. I can't be 24/7 teacher just yet, but It's becoming clear that that is my call. still, I'm enjoying the little ignorance with innocence and excitement. Yesterday I saw the relationship between body-cells and soul-cells, spectrums of water and our existence as spirits. I also saw some of my old fears. Fears of loosing my mom, fear of being discriminated or attacked for being gay. Right now, I'm very happy because I'm updating my blog-diary and baked a carrot cake. Yeshua is healing very quick but is itching a lot. Let us pray he feels more comfort soon.

Thank You for Listening,
Blessed By Love,
LoveAlways
x
333
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